Mom Club with Kelsey Ketcham

Kelsey Ketcham with her family. (Photo courtesy: Kelsey Ketcham)

I’ll admit I don’t know Kelsey Ketcham well; we’re not in the same friend circles, and we’ve never gotten together for a playdate, but every time I’ve interacted with her, I get a sense of genuine warmth and realness that always feels positive and refreshing. This momma of three, small-business owner (Kelsey and her husband Matt own and operate Peconic Gold Oysters), and local marketing pro is kind, friendly, and has a magnetic ease. When I asked her to be the next mom for “Mom Club,” she was instantly game. What I didn’t anticipate, though, was just how familiar Kelsey would feel from her “Mom Club” responses. It just goes to show how connected we North Fork moms really are, even if we don’t realize it at first. 

Read on as Kelsey shares about mothering on the North Fork in our monthly Mom Club—a Q&A with local North Fork moms.

Mom Club is made possible by Peconic Community School—an innovative option for hands-on, real-world learning on the North Fork. 

Q: Describe your parenting style in three words:

Kelsey: Relaxed, flexible, vibrant.

Q: What is your favorite thing about motherhood?

Kelsey: I love getting to experience things through my children's eyes. It is so fun to share things that I loved as a kid with my kids. I relish seeing my kids enjoy ice cream, The Wizard of Oz, or trips to Cape Cod. Big or small, they always make things fun and remind me to enjoy the little things and what really matters most.

Q: What’s your least favorite thing about motherhood?

Kelsey: There is always so much STUFF to do! I find it hard to prioritize between mundane and fun tasks when there's always a meal to make, laundry to do, a deadline to meet, an event to prepare for, and bedtime is looming.

Q: Would you change anything about motherhood? Tell us.

Kelsey: I would change the lack of societal support for mothers. It feels like all of us moms have the same challenges, like finding flexible work, childcare, or healthcare. I have a ton of help and support from family members and caretakers, and I still find it hard to do it all. I feel for moms without that level of support and believe our entire society would benefit if parents were more supported and respected.

Q: What role does nature play in raising your children?

Kelsey: The North Fork is an incredible place. I think it's no secret to families who live here just how special this place is. When we had kids, it felt like a whole new level of our community was unlocked. Friends I made in my twenties when I first moved out here also had children, and we got to move into this new chapter together. We have such a tight-knit community across the North Fork—we are not separated by our towns or school districts, and I feel like that is truly unique. Everyone knows each other or knows a friend of a friend, making it comfortable to meet up for playdates or at community events and genuinely enjoy the company.

We also live in this amazing farming community, allowing us to know where our food comes from and who grows it. I am delighted when my kids can differentiate between produce from Sang Lee or Wickham's and refer to restaurants based on their owner's name!

Q: What's your favorite recent thing that you've done with your children on the North Fork?

Kelsey: Nature is so important! We love exploring the woods at Downs Farm Preserve or Sound View Dunes during the ‘off’ season. Last year, Back to the Bays created an illustrated Long Island Marine & Coastal Field Guide, and my kids love finding and identifying species they know from the guide. It is so easy to get outside on the North Fork, regardless of the season. Of course, my kids love fishing too and spend autumn evenings catching porgies, blowfish, and weakfish on the oyster farm with their little Captain America and Moana rods from Zuke's Bait and Tackle.

Q: What's your favorite recent thing that you've done with your children on the North Fork?

Kelsey: Love Lane First Fridays! It is a really fun night out celebrating our community and seeing friends. This year, Peconic Gold Oysters participated as a vendor, so our kids ‘had’ to attend each event. We see so many friends, new and old, and the energy really excites my kids. They love to watch the bands, do all the thoughtful kids' activities, and of course get a ‘little treat.’

Q: What's your children's favorite thing you've recently done together on the North Fork?

Kelsey: Our oldest son, Wyatt, is obsessed with Riverhead Raceway, especially the School Bus Demolition Derby. The school buses all have names, and they have become main characters in our house, inspiring lots of demolition play with buses, cars, trucks, and boats! 

Q: What is one thing every child should experience on the North Fork?

Kelsey: Swimming in the Sound at sunset in August... and a Brady Rymer concert.

Q: Mothering lasts long after we're gone. It becomes the values that live within our children for their whole lives, too. What are some things that you hope your children carry with them forever?

Kelsey: I hope one day they realize how truly lucky we are to call the North Fork home, appreciating our close-knit community, knowing where our food comes from, and the real easy groove of our lives.  I hope they carry the spirit of community into their own families and careers and spread joy and positivity wherever they go.